And the Winner Is . . .

Some time ago, Jason Heat postulated that "Dock of the Bay" by Otis Redding might just be the most well-written song of all time. However, here at These Gentlemen, we believe in letting the people have a voice. We believe in experimentation, trial-and-error, and that 1 million years ago an intergalactic dictator named Xenu used nuclear weapons to kill billions of aliens, thus creating Earth. Or something like that. The point is, we can't just let a hypothesis like that one go untested.

And what do the results say?

With all votes tallied, including absentee ballots, late ballots, hanging chads, pregnant chads, spotted chads, citizens of the Republic of Chad, and football star Chad Ochocinco . . .

THE WINNER

of

THE GREATEST SONG EVER WRITTEN CONTEST

After surviving five grueling rounds of competition, we have found that Mr. Heat was indeed correct in his assertion. "Dock of the Bay" is the most well-written song of all time. Congratulations, Otis Redding, your final recording will go down in history as a masterpiece for the ages.

Thank you to all who participated, and I look forward to thinking up further contests in the future. Until next time, I leave you with some of the more famous attempts by other artists to recapture Redding's magic. Good night, and God bless.