Thursday, February 5, 2009

Obama's MTV Show

This morning I read an opinion piece with perhaps the most baller byline ever: "The writer is president of the United States."

The article got me back to thinking about the differences between our two major political parties in regards to the way to fix the economy. I wrote something about this topic in a blog post a couple weeks ago, but left it unfinished. Now, I'm more confident in my own thoughts. There seems to be a major rift between Republicans and Democrats, even though both seem to understand that the growing unemployment problem is the primary factor in the current economic plummet.

Republicans believe that tax cuts for small businesses will allow them to hire more people.
Democrats believe that government spending on government projects will increase the number of jobs.

During the Clinton years we had higher taxes and increased government spending.
During the Clinton years, the US economy reached it's highest level of growth ever.

During the Bush years we had lower taxes and decreased government spending.
During the Bush years, the US economy plunged into a recession and suffered the worst decline in job growth since the Great Depression.

Is this simplistic? Hell yes. And I'm aware there are other major factors. But when it comes to simply the issues of taxation and government spending - I don't really see how Republicans can still believe more tax cuts will solve our current problem.

When I read Barack Obama's editorial in today's Washington Post this morning, I knew I would be able to publish my thoughts on this subject. I write this post partly because I figured Obama's words should be seen by as many eyes as possible. But also, because I was more confident in my own words. Obviously, his words are better, and you should read those:

"The Action Americans Need" by Barack Obama


On the other end of the political spectrum... Newsweek Magazine Online is doing a weekly MTV-style reality show about the Obama Administration. It's full of bubblegum-pop-music montages and the same hilarious editing styles. It's even narrated by a fake Obama! It's pretty amazing, and I'm looking forward to episode two. Maybe it will make the MTV generation actually watch politics? This all leads me to my idea for my next post: SportsCenter for CSPAN. Let's make it happen America!

Here is the Newsweek mock show (Thank you to 'Celsius' for showing this to me): NEWSWEEK

And here is the same thing embedded from YouTube. Please watch, it's pretty funny:

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Suburbia

Two amusing takes on the suburbs today came across my computer screen:

First Allison Arieff, who writes really wonderful irregular blog posts on the New York Times. She mentions a few good books and a few good examples of more forward thinking ideas actually in practice, and one in Vienna, VA to boot!

Then there's DCist's greatest and most insane and insightful poster - Monkeyerotica with a expletive-laden takedown of all that is unholy in the exburban hell that is Prince Williams County (if it's not ringing a bell, think Nissan Pavilion).

I'm not gonna lie, I feel the monkey's assessment is more accurate.

One Year in Four Colors - Justice League International Vol. 3

So I've decided to write a review or analysis of every Graphic Novel I read in 2009. I'd try for every comic, but none of us have that kind of time.
*Spoiler Warning* should be considered general practice.




Justice League International Vol. 3

Writers: Keith Giffen and JM DeMatteis
Artists: Kevin Maguire, Ty Templeton, and Steve Leialoha
Publisher: DC Comics

In the late '80s, the Justice League was at a crossroads. After a brief flirtation with the 'Detroit Era' (a short lived period in Justice League history where almost everyone you've probably heard of left the team, Aquaman took over and moved the league into a bunker in Detroit with only four complete unknowns, Zatanna, Martian Manhunter, and the Elongated Man making the roll call) the JLA was in shambles and the original Justice League of America series was cancelled for the first time. In the wake of Crisis on Infinite Earths the entire DCU was being reorganized, and a Justice League series was a must. Given the success of Crisis a new crossover was planned, Legends, which would end with the reformation of a new league and a brand new #1 issue to launch the new title.

Editor Andy Helfer was in charge of putting together the book. He was told make it big, make it bold, make it about the stars again. Great. That sounds like a mandate for the classic JLA we all know and love.

There were a couple problems.

DC editorial politics being what they were back then, no one wanted anyone touching 'their' characters - and each editor had to approve usage of the characters they edited. So almost none of the big guns were available as they were all undergoing revamps in their respective titles. Superman, Flash, Wonder Woman, The Hawks - all off limits.

So who WAS on the team, he asked?

Well it turns out the roster was going to be decided in the pages of Legends. Sadly, the writers hadn't actually written Legends yet, nor did they know who would be in the league, and would he please leave them alone about it? Oh, and what's the status on Justice League?

Thankfully, Helfer found someone just crazy enough to take on the project with him, even without any idea of what they could do - comic stalwart and to be Legend Keith Giffen. They decided if they couldn't have a roster pre-planned, they'd come up with a situation for the book that was roster proof - the idea of an eccentric, mysterious businessman named Maxwell Lord who would attempt to manipulate the group from the outside, and eventually tie them to the United Nations. instead of being the Justice League of America, they would be Justice League International. Instead of a satellite headquarters operating in geosynchronous orbit around the Earth, why not dozens of embassies, each located in a UN member nation. They would embrace the B-, C-, and D-list level of their characters as an opportunity to really develop them.

And the biggest change? Instead of just being fun... could they maybe be funny?

It had really never been done before, and it payed off huge. A total paradigm shift from any league before, or franchise team book at all. If the JLA had always been a book about a bunch of super powered people who did their jobs extremely well, this was the book that saw them driving each other crazy on coffee break, or having to live with each other. This was the book about regular people who just happened to be super-heroes. And maybe they barely got along at all.

Joining the creative team was scripter JM DeMatteis (Giffen did the plots, but was afraid of handling dialogue), a noted comic scribe known mainly for straight ahead heroics and deep spiritual stories of faith. Turns out he had a wicked sense of humor too, and filled each of Giffen's plots with gag after gag. The two of them become so synonymous with each other for so long it was a shock to learn that they had been working together years before they ever met.

Rounding out the group was a brand new artist, utterly unheard of at the time, that they decided to take a chance on - the incomparable Kevin Maguire (one of my absolute favorites, and one of the ONLY artists I buy just for the art). His clean linework and INCREDIBLE facial expressions made the book and gave life to each of the heroes. His characters didn't pose - they acted and reacted like real people caught in the utterly absurd situations that men running around in capes find themself in. If regular comic books are the newscast, JLI was the moments before the camera roles and the guests sit around picking their noses.

This became one of the most beloved runs in comic history, and changed the nature of the league for years after. Eventually becoming a house style that tended toward boorish self parody once Giffen and crew left, the original books were packed with a solid mix of action, characterization, and humor. This is the run where we loved to hate Guy Gardner, watched Blue Beetle and Booster Gold become the Schlafstein/Pratt of comic books, where J'onn got addicted to choco cookies, and Batman actually made a JOKE! It was incredible, and remains beloved to this day.

This book is the third volume in the run, and it's not as strong as the first two. The jokes are starting to feel a bit more forced, as the humor/action blend is edging further and further towards humor (and there's a LOT of G'nort in here, a character I enjoy much more in smaller doses). The art is also uneven, with Maguire handling most of it, but assisted by Steve Leialoha and Ty Templeton on chapters. Templeton is solid as always, but Leialoha looks ungly and rushed and certainly not up to today's usual quality.

There are some great moments though - including the early onset of Blue and Gold shenanigans. Also, Giffen creation Lobo has a major role in the book and as this is from before he devolved in a one note self parody, his character is refreshing and enjoyable in a way I've really never seen other than when written by Morrison.

I also finally got the fish-dolphin reference from 52.

Basically this is part of a treasured run. If you're collecting the whole thing, or already love these characters, then reccomended. But if not - start with Vol. 1. They're better comics overall, and the beginning of this particular chapter in JL history as well.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

The Science of Setlists (or Your Fans Own Your Albums, Idiot!)

I feel it is time to once and for all lay down the law on the proper ratios and key ingredients of a great setlist at any point in a bands career. So assuming for simplicity a rock and roll band with 10-12ish 3-5ish minute songs per album here is what you should do:

After 1 Album:
Play 15 songs.
No matter if your album has 9 or 17 songs on the album play 15 songs and give people their money's worth. Covers, b-sides, unreleased songs it doesn't matter, give your people 15 songs.

After 2 Albums :
20ish songs. 60% of the set from album #2 and 40% from album #1.
Most bands want to showcase how great their new album is and are tired of their first album at this point anyway. But your fans likely still love the first album, so don't leave them out in the cold. By the same token if you're only playing 3 or 4 song from your new album at this point, you're already coasting on the past.

After 3 Albums:
22-25ish songs. 50% from the new album, 50% from the first two albums.
Now that you have more leeway you don't have to make their set nearly as heavy with new stuff, but they should still be playing plenty from all three earlier albums.

After 4 Albums:
25ish songs tops. 40% new album, 60% from the first three.
At this point your set will be as long as it should ever get, but don't drag things out. If you play much more than two dozen songs it just means that more fans will need knee surgery and chiropractor visits.

After 5+ Albums
Still 25ish songs. 30% new album. Make sure to play songs from every album.
Unless you have 15 albums, you should still be touching on every era. Maybe favor one or two of your old albums, but keep things mixed up.

Other rules:

Go Easy On the Unreleased Material
Even if a band is really excited about songs that haven't been recorded yet, there's still no way they should be playing more than three or so.

Always Play At Least Five Album Tracks
If you have a large following of avid fans, then they own your album! Sure some audience members would like to hear the hits, but the album buying public (even as it shrinks) is the population that will keep your career going.

One Encore is Generally Enough
Unless you played the best show of the tour, or you just finished a great hometown gig, one encore is plenty. Only a select few bands like Wilco have established a great reputation for multiple encores, and that was only after they had a good amount of material to work with.

Stuff I Love-Second Edition

It's Tuesday. You know what that means.

MICHIGAN FOOTBALL: SOMETHING I LOVE



Since Oz took the topic I had in mind for this week's Love column with his Final Fantasy VII post (which I firmly believe is the best video game, or at least, RPG, ever made), I've decide to go in a different direction and explore something this blog rarely does-the world of collegiate sports.

When I first arrived on the campus of the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, in September of 2003, I couldn't care less about football, or any other professional sport for that matter. In fact, when my mother had asked me if I wanted to purchase student season tickets for football season, I dismissed the idea immediately.

I'm not sure when it happened exactly, I don't know if I could really find the moment I fell in love with Michigan Football, in fact, I think it was probably a gradual process. In high school I felt so removed from school spirit, I'd almost come to think of it as a negative. But being at a place like Michigan, where it was almost impossible not to have school spirit (yes, even in the Theatre Department), it was like being a fan of the football team just came with the territory. More than that, it was impossible to avoid. Nearly every student on campus was glued to their TV or making the march to Michigan Stadium every Fall Saturday, and to be honest, when I realized what I was missing out on, I suddenly understood why everyone had told me it was so important to get season tickets.

I watched every game freshman year, even if I didn't even always know why. I just knew I was somehow connected to this team, that unlike rooting for pro sports, these kids were not playing for a state they weren't really from, or playing for cars and money (usually), they were playing for us. Because they were us. Students.

Michigan Football has fallen on some tough times lately. In the span of two years, we lost to Appalachian State, went 3-9, had our first losing season since the sixties, and missed out on a bowl bid for the first time in 33 years. It's a damn tough time to become a fan. But, the way I see it, I don't really have a choice. I couldn't stop loving Michigan Football if I wanted to.

Plus, it's gonna be so sweet when we go 12-0 next year and everybody can just shut the hell up.

Monday, February 2, 2009

25 Random Facts About Myself

by Michael Phelps

(this is a guest column)

Hi everyone. Long time reader, first time writer. I wrote one like, months ago on my fbook account back before it was super popular, and I thought I'd share it all with you now. Same rules apply... Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 10 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you it's because I want to know more about you.

----------

1) When I was little, they told me I had ADHD, and to help me find an outlet for my energy, I started swimming.

2) the secret to my success is that when I'm in the water, I just pretend Ron Jeremy is behind me chasing me. Like right behind me.

3) i am awesome. oh that wasn't a secret? my bad.

4) the best sex I ever had was with Oprah (who, by the way, would totally make a kick-ass Batman, just sayin')
(O-MG so good)

5) Lil Wayne's last album was my favorite album of the year. I think it's the best album since Coolio's Gangsta's Paradise.
(best rap album EVER?)

6) I really love to read magazines, and I have a lot of subscriptions to them. I have subscriptions to People, Us Weekly, O, Sports Illustrated, US News and World Report, TIME, the Economist, and High Times.
(this is a good magazine)

7) I cry easily during movies, and I'm a real sucker for animal movies. I cried so much during Seabiscuit that I ran out of tears. And I just recently saw Marley and Me, which was way sadder than I though it was going to be.
(I couldn't believe the ending)

8) It is a personal goal of mine to be named one of People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive. I think I deserve it.

9) I've been taking swing dancing lessons since I was 14, but I've never gotten a chance to show that side of me off. That's why I less-than-secretly want to be on Dancing With the Stars... I think I'd have a good shot to win.

10) I am 100% confident I could beat Aquaman in swim competition, but he has not responded to the voicemails I left him challenging him.

(O-ver-rated)

11) I can quote virtually any episode of Friends.

12) I tell my mom she's an inspiration to me all the time, and I mean it.

13) My favorite books are picture books, especially the ones that have pop-out images. Everyone else probably threw theirs away when they were like 8 or something but I kept mine. I try to read every night before going to bed with my girlfriends.

14) My favorite girlfriend right now is Hillary. I think she's my favorite because she never complains about having to share me with my other girlfriends, and I really like that about her.
(Hillary Duff)

15) In high school I didn't have many friends. Living well is the best revenge is it not?

16) Ian Thorpe was like a God to me growing up. Now that I've topped his accomplishments, I figure that basically makes me a God too.

(human torpedo? my ass)

17) I'm currently gathering together a campaign team to help me run for Mayor of Baltimore after my swimming career is done. It is after all the greatest city in America. My first order of business would be to turn the Baltimore Aquarium into my own swimming pool.

("BALTIMORE: the Greatest City in America")


18) My teammates sometimes call me "Gomer" - based on Gomer Pyle who was the good-natured, naïve country boy played by Jim Nabors on the Andy Griffith Show.

("Gomer")

19) Speedo's hurt.

20) I can’t stop playing Pokemon on gameboy.

21) I could never eat chocolate again and be perfectly fine, but if they ever discontinue the production of Swedish fish, I'm in big trouble!

22) I have only been in love once... with myself!!

23) I don't know why Alex Rodriguez got to be lead guitar... but I am DEF the superior Rock Band player.



24) I was TIME's 2006 Person of the Year :P

25) the Naked Party was my favorite play of 2008.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

A History of Justice - Superman

SUPERMAN
(Clark Kent)

The Story: You've all heard it before, but it bears repeating - the last son of a doomed world who instead becomes the champion of another.

When his warnings about planetary instability go unheeded by a political machine too old to change, Scientist Jor-El (and possibly Al Gore) creates a rocketship to save his infant son from certain destruction. As the planet smoked and crackled around him he sent Kal-El to Earth - and in moments, after an entire world of people died in a sizzling heartbeat, Kal-El became the last son of Krypton.

Landing on Earth in the middle of the American heartland he was found by Jonathan and Martha Kent - a young couple who had once been told they would never conceive a child of their own. Instead of reacting with fear and hate to this alien baby crawling from the wreckage of the stars, they took the boy as their son and raised him. They named him Clark Kent.

Clark grew up in Smallville hiding his incredible gifts from the world - his body stores and converts yellow sunlight like a solar battery, giving him amazing powers of flight and speed. The different density of Earth hardens his muscles, and gives him incredible strength beyond those of normal men. But his heart grows up human, a gift from the Kents, and one that will be his greatest strength and greatest weakness.

Eventually Clark moves to the gleaming city of Metropolis where he becomes a reporter for the Daily Planet. When a plane is about to crash down, Clark is forced to act in public for the first time, bearing a costume sewn by his mother with a cape made of the very blanket he was sent to Earth in. It was at that moment a young reporter named Lois Lane would first name him Superman, and give voice to the hopes of an entire populace - truly now, men could fly.

Disguising himself with a pair of glasses, and an entire shift of posture, physique, and tone - bumbling Clark Kent fell in love with Lois Lane, who in turn only had eyes for Superman, creating one of the classic love triangles in modern fiction - until they instead became one of comics' most formidable teams and an enduring marriage in a time when the idea of aging seems anathema to most publishers.



What Makes Him Cool - Here's what makes Superman so cool - his weakness. And not Kryptonite. His capacity and willingness to love.


Imagine having absolute, infinite power and instead of choosing to live like a God, instead you chose to live like a man. Instead of using this incredible power for any kind of selfish gain, instead of ruling over the world with even a benevolent fist, instead you used your power to become a champion of justice and one of utter selflessness. Superman is pure good, the beacon in darkness that guides us to what is right. Cool may go in and out of style but Superman is timeless. His is the ultimate story of nature vs. nurture - would anyone else with these powers act the way he does? Is it his genetics or his being brought up by two such wonderful and loving parents?

His is also the ultimate immigrant story, which makes perfect sense for two young Jewish boys in the 1930s. He is a stanger from a strange land who lands in America - where he hides out because of the fear of being different, but also has the opportunity to become the best of us. Superman represents the 'invisible minority' - the Jew, or Catholic, or anyone else who's differences reach their core but aren't readily apparent skin deep. He was adopted by a kindly couple in Kansas - that basic metaphor for American values (the Wizard of Oz used Kansas to create the All-Ameerican Girl too). And in what I think is an incredibly poignant twist, the only physical object that can harm him are pieces of his former home, now radioactive, acting as a metaphor for the way America wants us to abandon our past in order to be a part of something new.

But what makes Superman so incredibly cool? His is a love story that defies description. He chooses to love someone he has to know he'll outlive. He puts himself in a situation where there can be nothing but future pain but does so with abandon, because that love is all-consuming. Everyone he knows will one day die and leave him here on Earth alone and yet he gives a piece of himself to all of them just the same. What kind of toll does that take on a man, not knowing if you're ever going to die? And his love is his greatest weakness - by caring about people he can be made vulnerable, simply because they are. If he were hard, or cold, he would be unstoppable - but he wouldn't be human. And make no mistake, powers or not, Superman is Clark Kent first and foremost. Not the bumbling fool he masquerades to be, but the Clark Kent that grew up in Smallville - a lonely outcast that found a group of incredible friends in the 30th century where every kid could fly.

Superman is the shining light of optimism, the best the Super-Hero community has to offer. He is the image of the Justice League. My favorite image is the one at the top of this post - Superman just sitting on a cloud, pefectly relaxed, watching the world. No muscles rippling, no great effort. He doesn't need to. He's Superman - why worry? Things are going to be okay.

And so we don't have to worry either.

Reccomended Reading:

JLA - American Dream (W-Grant Morrison, A-Howard Porter): Including possibly my favorite Superman moment of all time - after single handedly pulling the moon back into orbit, Superman returns to Earth as it's under siege by the Bull-Host of Heaven. The rogue angel Asmodel has decided to succeed where Lucifer failed and overthrow God himself. J'onn J'onzz stands there, charred and tattered, refusing to give way, when Superman puts a hand on his shoulder and says "You've done enough, old friend. Stand down. I'll take over now." And charges into battle.

The Flash puts it best when he says "This is the guy who said he couldn't live up to his myth? He's wrestling an angel..."

All-Star Superman (W-Grant Morrison, A-Frank Quitely): Quite possibly the single greatest Superman story of all time. In 12 issues of award winning work two masters of the craft show us just how amazing Superman is. When Superman is finally about to die, he is charged with 12 labors to accomplish before he can pass on. From Lois refusing to believe that Superman is Clark because she just can't accept having been right for years and being lied to, to Lex drawing on his eyebrows out of vanity, to Jimmy Olsen turning into Doomsday, this book is everything you ever need to know about Superman and those he cared about.


Final Crisis: Superman Beyond, and Final Crisis #7 (W-Grant Morrison, A-Doug Mankhe): Where Lois lies dying in a hospital bed and the only way to save her is for Superman to lead a team of upermen from across the multiverse on a suicide mission against a vampire God. Where he makes the ultimate sacrifice in a moment dubbed "Hate Crime, Meet Selfless Act" - and where he contains the cure for Lois, a liquid no one but Gods can ever contain inside a single kiss because "Nothing can hold or contain Bleed, they said. They were wrong. Superman can."


And finally he saves all of existence just by wishing for a happy ending.


Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow? (W-Alan Moore, A-Curt Swan): After the Crisis of Infinite Earths, Superman was being rebooted. And so Alan Moore and legendary Superman artist Curt Swan got to tell the definitive ending to everything Superman had been up until that point, and it was beautiful. It's been done to death now, but at the time, seeing Superman alone in the Fortress of Solitude crying with Krypto at his side was one of the most heartbreaking moments I experienced as a young adult. And it had quite possibly the single best intro to any comic ever -



"This is an IMAGINARY STORY

(which may never happen, but then again may)
about a perfect man who came from the sky and did only good.
It tells of his twilight, when the great battles were over and the great miracles long since performed;
of how his enemies conspired against him and of that final war in the snowblind wastes beneath the Northern Lights;
of the women he loved and the choice he made between them;
of how he broke his most sacred oath, and how finally all the things he had were taken from him save one.
It ends with a wink.
It begins in a quiet midwestern town, one summer afternoon in the quiet midwestern future.
Away in the big city, people still sometimes glance up hopefully from the sidewalks, glimpsing a distant speck in the sky... but no: it's only a bird, only a plane - Superman died ten years ago.

This is an IMAGINARY STORY...
Aren't they all?"
Aren't they?