Friday, July 3, 2009

Tomorrow is July 4th, right?

We were playing Foosball (as we do every single day, Feldman and I), when we heard a large crash and a bang.

We were startled! What a NOISE! And our door! Open! Could something have entered? The dire possibilities were endless! We even had to pause our game! Horrendous!

Then the dog began barking, loudly! Yapping and squealing - clearly something she disapproved of had approached. We knew this was a time for caution.

I approached, carefully, steadily. No sign of movement beyond the frame of the door. Behind our screen day, an empty space. At my feet, a pack of paper.

I reached down, and removed the rubber band.

What is it? Feldman asked with his eyes, showing curiosity.

"Well, a page of advertisements," I say, beginning the list of things in the packet. "A renter's insurance form for you, something for Loren, oooh my paycheck, ummm, something from Wells Fargo for ya?, and, tomorrow's newspaper."

I paused. I know I read that right. Did you read that right? Feldman pauses too. Then approaches. He had been reaching for the insurance forms but then, resisting hesitation, aims for the newspaper. He grabs with his left hand, as I hold the other side of the paper in my right. And we look. We double check the date. We look at the photos. We look at the headlines. We triple and quadruple check the date. Then we both say it aloud. Just, to be sure:

"It's Saturday."
"No, it's Friday."
"What's friday?"
"Today. Today is Friday."
"July the 4th."
"No, tomorrow is the fourth. We just talked about what we're doing tomorrow for the fireworks downtown. It has to be tomorrow."
"It's 2009, right?"
"Yeah. And today's the 3rd."
"I don't know, I didn't have work today. You did."
"I did. That was today, right?"
"I dunno. Where have you been all morning?"
"At work at the station."
"Well then yeah. We're trusting you then."

Well folks, from the looks of it, Tiger Woods will head into this weekend's AT&T Congressional tournament in Bethesda atop the leaderboard, the security gates to the National Mall will open at 10AM tomorrow morning (the Red Line will be running at full speeds but you should still expect delays of up to 30 minutes), and there's a rumor leaking that Mayor Fenty has hidden in a locked safe many documents proving DC has many firefighters that would not pass a background test - including many with charges on their records such as asault with a deadly weapon, and DUI's. Huh.

Sure is a strange phenomenon though, right? I mean, why would someone deliver this to us! Why us? I mean, no one here has a subscription to the Washington Post. Why would we get this?

2 comments:

B.Graham said...

OMG YOU'RE LIVING EARLY EDITION HOPE YOU DON'T GET CANCELED

Ozkirbas said...

@Britagne - DON'T PRESSURE THEM THEY HAVE LIVES TO SAVE