Showing posts with label These Gentlemen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label These Gentlemen. Show all posts

Sunday, January 30, 2011

February GentleMonth: Livin' on Love

Ah, the birds and the bees. Little naked cherubs. Hearts and diamonds (thanks, DeBeers).  Love is in the air; it’s everywhere, and thanks to all this snow the northeast may find itself in a slight baby boom nine months from now.  But for now, for this month, These Gentlemen are going to tackle the L-word head on. 

That’s right boys and girls, GentleMonth is back, and all through February we’ll be discussing what is probably the most oft-discussed topic in the history of man: Luurrve.  It's okay, we'll say it first.

So sit back, relax, and let the love wash over you.  Gross, guys, not that kind.  Okay maybe a little, if that’s what you really want.

Love and kisses,
TG

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

TG Goes to the State of the Union- I Mean GChat

BEFORE
B.Graham: State of the Union haay
ali d: Yeahhh
ali d: I should probably listen
ali d: But I have more pressing matters
B.Graham: audition prep?
ali d: werd

B.Graham: Aw that's nice
B.Graham: They're leaving a seat open for Gabby Giffords
ali d: Awww
ali d: That is really nice
ali d: I approve
B.Graham: Also everyone was assigned a bipartisan date
ali d: Like someone they had to sit next to?
ali d: Do they have to put out?
B.Graham: lol I don't think they have to put out
B.Graham: But yes they have to sit next to them

B.Graham: I wonder if [boyfriend] is in the room
B.Graham: I don't see any suits and sunglasses, but they have to be in there
ali d: Oh man, your boyfriend is so cool!
B.Graham: I know :D


DURING
B.Graham: Look at Boehner's face
Max Nova: He doesn't need a death mask. They'll just chop his head off and put it in a museum

Max Nova: I love all the fake-listening-faces the congressmen have

Max Nova: There are gangs in Colorado!
Max Nova: My mind is blown
B.Graham: Yeah man what else are they going to do out there?
Max Nova: meth
Max Nova: meth meth meth
B.Graham: Also: The Outsiders takes place in Oklahoma... don't let the boonies fool you!
Max Nova: Good point

B.Graham: Man I didn't expect him to draw that line [regarding undocumented students]
B.Graham: Yeah Obama!
Max Nova: I just don't understand how people can believe in a god who only likes Americans born in America
Max Nova: We're such a weird country. I don't believe in god and I like all people
B.Graham: I know

B.Graham: Ginsberg is passed the eff out right now
Max Nova: There's always someone who gets caught
B.Graham: Also justices can do whatever they want
Max Nova: They are not wearing anything under those robes
Max Nova: Except for freedom

Max Nova: Dear god, Boehner, just clap for the fucking gays you dumbass
Max Nova: oy
B.Graham: He can't; he might have to let go of his ass

Max Nova: This is where Boehner is supposed to burst into tears....
Max Nova: Oh shit, Scranton!!!
B.Graham: lmao did Boehner and Biden just pound it??
Max Nova: Possibly
B.Graham: I hope so

Max Nova: I wish I had Chilean Miners on my SOTU bingo. I'd be on fire
B.Graham: lol
B.Graham: Such a cynic
Max Nova: Bingo is America!


AFTER
B.Graham: Ugh [Paul Ryan] had me until he started talking about the healthcare law
David Pratt: Yeah seriously. This guy.
B.Graham: Well not "had" me, but I was ok with it
David Pratt: His transcript is already up online so
David Pratt: I imagine he was just taking notes while the speech was happening.
David Pratt: And most of this was planned well ahead of time.
B.Graham: Yeah
B.Graham: He looks stoned

David Pratt: Nothing in this is actually reacting to the State of the Union.
B.Graham: No
B.Graham: Well what could he say? Obama was like, Yeah I love everybody
David Pratt: I guess that's their plan.
David Pratt: "This speech is gonna be pretty awesome guys so we gotta pretend it just didn't happen.”
B.Graham: lol
B.Graham: I have a crush on our president
B.Graham: I am biased
David Pratt: He's easy to crush on.
David Pratt: I don't blame you.

David Pratt: Okay
David Pratt: This stuff he's saying now is just rephrasing what Obama said.

David Pratt: And now stay tuned for Michele Bachman with the response from insanity.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

'Tis the Season to be a Gentleman

The holiday time is upon us once more, coming around, as it seems to, at least once a year.  Here at These Gentlemen, we've decided to take the time between Christmas and New Year's to express our own thoughts on the holidays, and how we can make it a more gentlemanly experience for all.

We're a somewhat diverse cast here at the blog.  A few of us are Jewish, a few of us are Christian, at least one of us is an atheist.  Max is kind of a hipster so he might observe Saturnalia since like, everyone else is just ripping off of them, man.  We all observe our beliefs to varying degrees, but one thing we agree on is that this is a time of year when things are a little different.

From an evolutionary standpoint, it shouldn't be much of a surprise that winter is a hot bed of activity for religious observation.  It's harder to survive when the weather turns bad, which likely forced primitive man to group together in order to get by.  From that early development of communal togetherness during the harsher months, we've grown into a society which has faiths around the world all observing something or another during this time.  With that air of celebration, things can go very right or very wrong, depending on your approach.

So what does it mean to be a Gentleman during the holiday season?  Where does this sense of community bring us?  What are we doing right as a society, and where do we need to take a step back and apply a Gentleman's touch to the process?  That is exactly what we'll be exploring here as the season reaches its peak, and we do invite you to join in our conversations.

In the meantime, a happy holiday to you and yours, and we look forward to you enjoying our season's offerings here at These Gentlemen.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Who Are These Gentlemen? And Other Philosophs

TG is now two years old, which is fourteen in dog years, which is right smack dab in the middle of puberty for humans.  And, like an adolescent gaining and shedding personalities with each new semester to either fit in or stick out (or, tragically, both), we're having a slight identity crisis... in the way that George Bluth may have committed slight treason.  So we're going to try something else, something that will perhaps fit us, and you, better in the long run.

We met and talked for several hours Monday night, and the same question kept coming back: Who are we, exactly?  What is it that we need to say and why do we need to say it?  What does it mean to be a Gentleman on the cusp of 2011?  As it turns out, we have some fierce opinions on that topic.  So maybe These Gentlemen is exactly that: a small band of new adults looking around in shock and distaste at an increasingly mean-spirited, classless, un-gallant world.  How does one live a gentlemanlike existence in the 21st century?  Yeah, we don't know, either.  But herein lies the blog.

We will be making a few aesthetic changes as well as the afore-mentioned philosophical shift:
We will no longer work on a weekly schedule basis, in the hopes that in turn we will deliver you more in-depth, interesting reads. We will also, in our new iteration, focus more on collaborative efforts like RoundTables, GentleMonths, and the like, making them the rule rather than the exception.

So please have patience with our growing pains.  We're trying something new, but we think it could be a really good thing. And we hope that you think so, too.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Taking Thanksgiving Off

As I write this, I am at work, where I will remain until roughly 8:30PM this evening.  After which time, I will make the drive from Maryland back up to New York, taking a new route this time because according to my sources Delaware is going to be a parking lot until Monday.  I'll arrive at home around 4 in the morning, sleep until noon, and then wake up just to drive from my Mom's house to my Dad's.  There I'll enjoy an early Thanksgiving, go back to Mom's house for an evening one, and then leave for Maryland again the next day.

This has been my routine for three Thanksgivings running, despite my mother's protests that I don't really need to go to my Dad's place.  Ah well.

In any event, I will return next week, thankful that I have a family to go home to, a wonderful girlfriend to take with me, and dedicated (if silent) readers enjoying my work.  A Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours from me, and, I'm sure, all of us at These Gentlemen.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Happy Birthday

Since it hasn't been mentioned yet, I'll be the first to say it.

We're 2!

Happy Birthday These Gentlemen!  Gifts will be accepted in the form of cash or gift cards.

So I'd like to take a little of your time to reflect on what These Gentlemen has meant over these past 24 months.

We began as an idea in the brain of Jason Heat to gather some of his intelligent friends together and write some thoughtful essays on life in the hopes of creating discussions and gathering a community around a polite yet erstwhile discourse.  With John Ozkirbas on drums, Damien Nichols on bass, Adam Winer on lead guitar, Max Nova on the solemn head nod, Dan Strauss and his back-up dancers, Jason Heat on vocals, and me collecting 15%, we had ourselves a blog.

In our beginning, free-wheeling days, posts ranged from frequent to sporadic, of topics ranging from abusive relationships to beard grooming.  Those carefree days gave rise to an eclectic blend of personal stories, social commentary, reviews of music, movies, and games, and some purely informational fare.  Each member of the band more or less did their own thing, but every so often we'd release a collaborative effort, The Roundtable, leadership of which has switched hands occasionally.  Over time we brought in new acts, working with bands like Stevie B and the Sharpshooters, Matt Lindeboom's Jersey Devils,  and The Brett Abelman Project.  We also enjoyed great success with girl rocker B. Graham, country starlet ali d., and had a brief flirtation with the show tunes of Alex Keiper.  Our business was making posts, and business was good.

Through the last two years, we enjoyed great success in working together.  Our monthly meetings were the high point, where we'd get together and just jam, letting whatever ideas we had come and seeing if they went anywhere.  That's where we came up with hits like Guest Gentleman, GentleMonth, and our newest single, Gentleman in Residence. Also, there would often be food, and sometimes Damien would even show up.  Dan could unfortunately not attend, as he was on tour.

All good things don't necessarily come to an end, contrary to what you might be told by people trying to console you after the latest celebrity death.  Some of them just change, and with time, These Gentlemen succumbed to changes like everything else must.  The evidence is in the posts; as our collection of voices grew, the songs began to change.  Sometimes not everything we tried worked out, others met with relatively smashing success.  Regardless, over time other gigs came along, as they do, and after an extended period without producing anything, the band decided to go their separate ways.

But then . . .

A reunion tour began.

So that brings us to now.  I don't know if we're everything Jason Heat envisioned we would be - his silence on posting sort of speaks for itself on that matter.  Regardless, the Gentlemen continue to work, write, and collaborate, all in the name of making a more perfect blog for all of you.  We want, as always, to hear from you, to find out your input on the things we do, and, more importantly, the things we don't do; the topics you want to see us cover.  The subjects you want to see more than a post on - an essay, a conversation, a discussion.  We are here to make you think, and to broaden your horizons, and we do hope you'll do the same for us.  Singers are cool, and bands are pretty great, but what we're going for is more of a choir - or an orchestra.

There's something for everybody here at These Gentlemen, and we welcome you to take part in it.

For the last two years and for many more to come, we are but Gentlemen, and we are here to entertain you.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Gentlemen in Residence

We can talk about a lot of things here at These Gentlemen.

Throughout it's nearly two-year existence, we have brought you discussions from topics ranging from Facebook to Friday Night Lights, with seriousness from sex to Sesame Street. The crew here is a good one - we can claim host to conservatives and liberals, the religious and the atheist, living people and ghosts.

Ghost.

However, it was exactly because of this wide-ranging sphere of discussion that once upon a time, Jason Heat proposed to us all the idea of the Gentlemen in Residence program. Our discourse covers such a wide area that we are seldom apt to stop and stay with a single area of discussion. In short, we are qualified to talk about our lives, and our tendencies are to change our subject of writing with the same frequency as new things in our lives catch our interest. Don't get me wrong, we've had some awesome discussions here, but we've never taken the time out to really hone in on a single area of concern and write at length regarding it. That is where Jason foresaw the need for Gentlemen in Residence.

What we plan to do with this oft-discussed, now finally implemented system, is invite one new author to join our ranks each month. For the course of that month, you will be treated to a new post, appearing on Sundays, regarding the topic on which our new resident is far more qualified to discuss than we are. What will these topics be? We're going to let you be surprised. I think you'll like what we've come up with. Or rather, what we didn't come up with, and rather than go out and learn about it, just brought in someone new to talk about it for us. Whatever, same thing.

So while you can rest assured you will still be able to count on us for your daily dose of Art, Politics, and Life, now you'll also enjoy going in-depth in those areas with our guests once a week. I hope you're as excited about this new addition as we are. I think we're all going to learn something, and have some pretty cool discussions on the way. Also, if you think you've got what it takes to be a Gentlemen in Residence, let us know about it. We'd love to see what area of expertise you could bring to the blog.

As always, we are but Gentlemen.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Three Discussions

#1: The Pokewalker

The good folks over at the Pokemon company put out a reiteration of their second-generation games a few months ago. Pokemon Gold and Pokemon Silver (renamed HeartGold and SoulSilver) lets gamers like me, who may not have played Pokemon at all since the originals came out, go back to the Johto region and relive the familiar fun. Although I swear, if Entei doesn't stay in that Pokeball the next time I try to capture him, I am taking out the cartridge and throwing it into a wall.

Like most video game updates, this one brings with it tweaks to the original system, new areas, updated graphics, and many other twists and turns to differentiate this new iteration from the source material. What is far more noteworthy than anything they did within the game, however, is what they give you when you buy it. The Pokewalker; a small, Pokeball-colored (half white, half red) pedometer which you can hook onto your belt loop.

The Pokewalker allows you to transfer one Pokemon from your game into the pedometer, where you can then take a walk with it. Doing so earns experience for the Pokemon, and also confers upon you rewards that you would not be able to find easily within the game itself, if at all. You can receive these rewards in exchange for "watts," the virtual currency of the Pokewalker. Every 20 steps you take earns a watt, and enough watts will unlock new courses where you can go after even greater prizes. The most expensive of these currently costs 200,000 watts - the equivalent of 4,000,000 steps. Keep in mind that the average person walks 3,000-5,000 steps a day. Ever since I got the Pokewalker, on my days off I try to take between 10,000 and 20,000.

The Pokewalker makes you want to exercise - it encourages you and rewards you for putting down the actual game and going outside or getting on a treadmill. And while some people have come up with ways to cheat the system, the real victory here is that the video game industry, or at least Pokemon Inc., is making a real attempt. In a nation suffering an outbreak of obesity and overwhelmed with sedentary lifestyles, they have made a tool that helps fight this trend, even if only in a small way. This is not a game made for the purpose of physical activity, like the WiiFit titles, it is an add-on to a game that would otherwise have children sitting still for hours instead finding excuses to get outside and run around.

That, in my opinion, is a step - or twenty - in the right direction.


#2: The State of the State of Israel

Now, I didn't attend synagogue services as often as I should have growing up, but I know a few things about Jewish history. I understand things were pretty rough in the times up until now. The existence of Israel is the only major victory Jews have had as a people since the Old Testament (or as Jews call it, the Testament). It is a story positively rife with oppression, enslavement, hatred, bigotry, and occasionally genocide.

So when I read the news and see Israel pursuing exactly that kind of agenda against Palestine, it makes me a little uncomfortable, to say the least.

Of course, there's nothing here really that separates Israel from many other of the world's powerful nations. Russia built its foundation off of oppression ethnic minorities, and when that wasn't enough, its own people. Great Britain only let India become its own country after World War II weakened them too much to say otherwise. The United States, lest we forget, is one Native American slaughter after another edited from our history books. Israel is not doing anything that is altogether out of character for a nation - morals aside - just not one that chooses to call itself the Jewish nation.

It's definitely a larger conversation than what I intend to write here, but the government of Israel is completely out of character for the beliefs of the religion they represent. As the state of Israel, an independent nation for a people called Israelis, they're doing what they feel is necessary to protect themselves. As the Jewish State, they're doing more to spread anti-Semitism around the globe than any other group active today. So should Israel reform its domestic and foreign policy to stay more in-line with Jewish ideals, or should it simply drop the pretense of being the Jewish state? There's already a separation of Church and State within Israel, why not extend that distinction to the national stage?


#3: I Don't Wanna Grow Up

Toys 'R Us is still a place I visit occasionally, just to walk through it. It would probably lose the appeal if I were a more frequent visitor, but if I keep these nostalgic journeys down to once or twice a year, then there's still rush when you walk through the sliding doors and enter a gigantic (though it appeared much bigger when I was younger for some reason . . .) toy store.

But on my last trip, walking through the aisles, I noticed something.

One side of the aisle had Action Figures, the other side had Dolls. Past that, the next row had Sports on one side, and Dress Up on the other. Above these aisles, bright red signs featuring boys playing next to the Action Figure and Sports, soft pink signs with smiling girls above Dolls and Dress Up.

Alright, I get it. There's a target audience there. Their educational toys, stuffed animals, and other things like that are not so obviously gender-organized. Still, should that kind of thing really be so blatant? I don't even know if I think it's wrong, necessarily, just odd in this day and age for a company to so clearly state "these toys are for boys, these toys are for girls." My shock is less from that they do it and more that they haven't been sued by someone for it. Maybe the kind of people who would typically blow their gasket over the distinction being made get the same feeling I do when entering Toys 'R Us, and of COURSE it makes sense that girls would want the dolls and not boys. D'uh!

Or maybe they just don't have kids.


AND FINALLY - you have probably noticed the lack of activity here at These Gentlemen lately. The problem, it seems, with organizing a group of people all roughly around the same age and station in life is that the large transitional periods which happen in life all happen to these people at the same time. When dealing with law schools, internships, full-time jobs, travel schedules, etc., etc., trying to find suitable material to fit the These Gentlemen standards - and time to write it - can be difficult to say the least.

Regardless, so long as there exist topics in this world with the need for a gentlemanly perspective on them, These Gentlemen shall continue to exist. Plans are already being made for the Gentlemen to come back later this summer, bigger and more ambitious in our goals than ever. We promise, if you stick around, we will too, and you won't be disappointed at the outcome. Until then, I bid adieu.

Keep it classy.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Bidding Farewell

It has unfortunately become necessary for me to end my time here at These Gentlemen. I have enjoyed my time here, and I hope you all have enjoyed having me around, but other factors in life have come into play and I cannot ignore them. Perhaps when my sentence is up, should it come to that, I will be able to once again be a contributing member, but this isn't anything I can say for certain until after the trial.

I want to thank everyone who has read my work and commented on it, and I certainly hope you won't think less of me after what I've done. And to the lovely Ali Daniels, even if worse comes to worst, I will be there for at least the second birthday.

Farewell, These Gentlemen, and may you continue to provide both style and substance for the readers of this blog.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Greatest Song Ever Written Contest 2010: Round One

It has begun. From our initial list, the contenders have been narrowed down to 32 songs which will compete for the title of "Best Song Ever Written."

I'd like to take this moment to remind everybody that the emphasis is on the "Written" portion. This isn't about popularity or commercial success or notoriety. This is about the quality of the work from the most objective point of view possible when examining music. Does the quality of the music supplement and enrich the lyrics, if there are any? Do those lyrics reach out across generational and cultural gaps? Could anyone, at any place, at any time, listen to this song and grasp its meaning? Will it age itself into irrelevance, or will the tune truly become timeless?

In the next 5 rounds of competition, that is what you, the reader, will decide. The contest is now out of the hands of These Gentlemen and into yours. Each week, the votes will be released and the list reduced by half until a clear winner emerges. That song will be declared the Best Song Ever Written.

To vote, simply send an e-mail to TGSongContest@gmail.com with "Song Contest" in the title line. All you need to do is list the name of the song you're voting for. No more than one vote per person, per bracket. That means this week you can vote for 16 songs, next week 8, and so on and so forth.

Now, I present to you the songs which will contend in this, the opening round of the very first These Gentlemen Greatest Song Ever Written Contest! Take the time to listen, think carefully, and get your votes in by Tuesday, January 13th at midnight.

Off we go!

ROUND ONE

1st Bracket:

"Wake Up" by The Arcade Fire
vs.
"Music Sounds Better With You" by Stardust


2nd Bracket:

"Renegade" by Styx
vs.
"Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley


3rd Bracket:

"Ain't No Sunshine" by Bill Withers
vs.
"In My Life" by The Beatles


4th Bracket:

"Just a Girl" by No Doubt
vs.
"Moon River" by Henri Mancini


5th Bracket:

"Roadrunner" by The Modern Lovers
vs.
"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole


6th Bracket:

"I Only Have Eyes For You" by The Flamingos
vs.
"Wonderwall" by Oasis


7th Bracket:

"Build Me Up, Buttercup" by The Foundations
vs.
"Don't Stop Believing" by Journey


8th Bracket:


"Leaving on a Jet Plane" by John Denver
vs.
"Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson


9th Bracket:

"Love Song" by The Cure
vs.
"Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by Wham!


10th Bracket:

"Juicy" by The Notorious B.I.G.
vs.
"Born In the U.S.A." by Bruce Springsteen


11th Bracket:

"Under Pressure" by Queen & David Bowie
vs.
"God Only Knows" by The Beach Boys


12th Bracket:

"Superstition" by Stevie Wonder
vs.
"Tangled Up in Blue" by Bob Dylan


13th Bracket:

"Clair de Lune" by Claude Debussy
vs.
"Dock of the Bay" by Otis Redding


14th Bracket:

"Walk the Line" by Johnny Cash
vs.
"Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd


15th Bracket:

"I Want You Back" by The Jackson 5
vs.
"Moondance" by Van Morrison


16th Bracket:

"Georgia On My Mind" by Ray Charles
vs.
"Imagine" by John Lennon

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

These Gentlemen Contest: The Greatest Song Ever Written

I'd like to take a moment to direct everyone's attention back to this post.

Shortly after this was written, I came to These Gentlemen with an idea - a proposition, if you will. Just as The Heat outlined in "The Best Songs of All Time" Going off of the criteria he outlined, I put the question to my fellow Gentlemen; what would YOU qualify as the greatest songs ever written?

The answers were as varied as you might expect. Enjoying music is a purely subjective experience, but there are certain songs everyone can agree on as being exceptionally well, if not perfectly, executed by their creators. Elements of music quality, emotional content, and lyrics blend together in a unique way to form a truly unforgettable, timeless piece of art. While none of these may be particularly our favorite song, we have singled them out amongst our individual libraries as fulfilling these conditions, being as objective as we possibly could be in such a scenario.

So how does this concern you, the reader? I'll tell you how.

This will be the beginning of the first ever These Gentlemen Greatest Song Ever Written Contest. From our initial list of nearly 100 songs, we will hold a round of voting to narrow it down to a more manageable 32. Those 32 songs will then be entered into a 5-round, single-elimination tournament which you, the reader, will determine the winner of based on your write-in votes.

Before we get started, I'm going to post the list of what we'll be choosing from up here for everyone to see. Then, some time will be given for the Gentlemen to familiarize themselves with the songs they might not know. When that's done, we'll narrow down our list, and the tournament brackets will be announced. So start commenting now, you may just sway some opinions ahead of the vote.

Without further ado, the These Gentlemen list of candidates for Greatest Song Ever Written:

1) "#1" by Goldfrapp
2) "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gaye
3) "Ain't No Sunshine" by Bill Withers
4) "A Milli" by Lil Wayne
5) "Another Travelin' Song" by Bright Eyes
6) "Apparitions" by The Matthew Good Band
7) "Baudelaire" by . . . and You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead
8) "Beast of Burden" by The Rolling Stones
9) "Be Thankful For What You Got" by Massive Attack
10) "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson
11) "Bizarre Love Triangle" by New Order
12) "Blind" by Hercules and Love Affair
13) "Blueberry Hill" by Fats Domino
14) "Born in the U.S.A." by Bruce Springsteen
15) "Brandenburg Concerto No. 3 in G" by Johann Sebastian Bach
16) "Build Me Up, Buttercup" by The Foundations
17) "Canon in D Major" by Pachelbel
18) "Cannonball" by Damien Rice
19) "Carry On My Wayward Son" by Kansas
20) "Cassandra Gemini" by The Mars Volta
21) "Clair de Lune" by Claude Debussy
22) "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd
23) "Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground" by The White Stripes
24) "District Sleeps Alone Tonight" by The Postal Service
25) "(Don't Fear) The Reaper" by The Blue Oyster Cult
26) "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey
27) "El Scorcho" by Weezer
28) "Feel Good Revolution" by Bright Eyes
29) "Fireworks" by The Animal Collective
30) "Float On" by Modest Mouse
31) "Funky but Chic" by David Johansen
32) "Georgia On My Mind" by Ray Charles
33) "God Only Knows" by The Beach Boys
34) "Gonna Fly Now" by Bill Conti
35) "Good Vibrations" by The Beach Boys
36) "Got to Get You Into My Life" by The Beatles
37) "Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley
38) "Heart of Glass" by Blondie
39) "Heroine" by The Velvet Underground
40) "Holiday" by Weezer
41) "Home" by Marc Broussard
42) "Hurricane" by Bob Dylan
43) "Imagine" by John Lennon
44) "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz
45) "In My Life" by The Beatles
46) "I Only Have Eyes For You" by The Flamingos
47) "I Think We're Alone Now" by Tommy James and the Shondells
48) "I Want You Back" by The Jackson 5
49) "Juicy" by The Notorious B.I.G.
50) "Just a Girl" by No Doubt
51) "Killing Me Softly" by Roberta Flack
52) "Leaving on a Jet Plane" by John Denver
53) "Love Song" by The Cure
54) "Maiden Voyage" by Herbie Hancock
55) "Margaritaville" by Jimmy Buffett
56) "Marrakesh Express" by Crosby, Stills, and Nash
57) "Mas, Que Nada" by Jorge Ben
58) "Midnight Train to Georgia" by Gladys Knight
59) "Moondance" by Van Morrison
60) "Moon River" by Henry Mancini
61) "More Adventurous" by Rilo Kiley
62) "Music Sounds Better With You" by Stardust
63) "Nemo's Egg" by Thomas Newman
64) "Night and Day" by Cole Porter
65) "Over the Hills and Far Away" by Led Zeppelin
66) "Poison" by Bell Biv Devoe
67) "Renegade" by Styx
68) "Revolution" by The Beatles
69) "Roadrunner" by Jonathan Richman
70) "Samson" by Regina Spektor
71) "Shelter" by Ray Lamontagne
72) "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay" by Otis Redding
73) "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
74) "Superstition" by Stevie Wonder
75) "Tangled Up In Blue" by Bob Dylan
76) "The City" by D Plan
77) "The Way I Feel Inside" by The Zombies
78) "Thirteen" by Big Star
79) "Ticket to Ride" by The Beatles
80) "Time is Tight" by Booker T and the MGs
81) "Trapeze Swinger" by Iron & Wine
82) "Under Pressure" by David Bowie & Queen
83) "Wake Up" by The Arcade Fire
84) "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by Wham!
85) "Walk the Line" by Johnny Cash
86) "Waterloo Sunset" by The Kinks
87) "Wave" by Antonio Carlos Jobim
88) "What's Love Got to do With it" by Tina Turner
89) "Where it's At" by Beck
90) "Wherever I May Roam" by Metallica
91) "Whistling in the Dark" by They Might Be Giants
92) "Wonderwall" by Oasis
93) "Won't Get Fooled Again" by The Who
94) "Worked Up So Sexual" by The Faint
95) "Wouldn't it be Nice" by The Beach Boys
96) "You Can Call Me Al" by Paul Simon
97) "You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC

97 songs have entered! Only 32 songs will leave! Keep reading to find out which of these will make into our first ever Greatest Song Ever Written Contest, and make your thoughts known now!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Oh, Hello!

Today, on Thanksgiving Eve, These Gentlemen give thanks for new members. We also give thanks that said new members have been so patient, for in the haze of work, school, and holidays, we have not yet given them their due: the Introduction.

Alex Keiper - Alex is an actress and freelance costume worker in the world of D.C. theatre who is currently rehearsing the role of Emilie for Greenbelt Arts Center's production of Les Liaisons Dangereuses. Alex escaped to the University of Maryland in College Park from the small town of Piqua, Ohio, where she was an avid dancer and show choir participant. She spent a year in New York City after graduation pursuing work in art galleries and theatres, but finding the job climate less than favorable, has moved back to D.C. to try her hand in the District, working toward her certification as a yoga instructor in the meantime. She brings to the Gentlemen a degree in art history and a fabulous fashion sense (including an unparalleled love for corsets and handkerchiefs).

Brett Abelman - Born and raised in the D.C. suburbs (mostly in Gaithersburg), Brett is also a University of Maryland grad, holding degrees in theatre and English, the job market's enemies. Currently a Gentleman of Leisure, Brett spends most of his time pursuing his passion: creative writing. Focusing mostly on plays (his play "The Old Man of the Sea of Stories" recently won the Audience Choice Award for Rorschach Theater's Myth Appropriation series) and some prose fiction, he hopes one day to write for video games, as he sees the medium as the storytelling of the future. Futurism and speculative fiction are also topics he hopes to tackle here at These Gentlemen, and he looks forward to playing devil's advocate to our arguments. You can also read more of his work in his story-a-day blog, http://larondeinfinite.blogspot.com/


We look forward to hearing Alex and Brett's fresh voices on the blog, and thank them for waiting for us to get on the ball. We hope that their addition will lead to a resurgence of spirited and sustained discourse, only on These Gentlemen.

Friday, November 20, 2009

One Year Old

It passed us by a bit, but I wanted to take a moment to acknowledge that as a site and a group, These Gentlemen is now just over a year old - and I think that's pretty cool, and pretty impressive. In the course of the past year, a lot of writing has been done on a variety of subjects - with thought, care, and craft going into each piece. We've had periods of great output, and we've had periods with not a lot to say - but every time we catch the bug again and I read something truly great on this site.

With a year under our belts, a lot of thinking has gone into what our purpose and priorities should be - and as often as they've changed in the past 365+ days, and as often as they will continue to do so, I think the core goal remains the same - to have an outlet for people with great intelligence, insight, and heart to respond to the world around them in a way that excites, elucidates, and affects. To create a forum for discussion that might not otherwise exist. And to try and aspire to the status of A Gentleman - one who thinks about himself, others, and their place in the world; cares about art, culture, and the society that surrounds it and the people who live it; that treats others with honor and respect, even in the face of honest differences.

I want to thank our current roster of writers who find the time, in spite of being starving artists, overworked law students, momentous activists, and generally busy people to take the time to share as often as they can.
They're all good writers and good friends - honor them by commenting. A lot. We feed on the stuff.

As for me, I promise to take this one year marker as a moment to reinvest in this site as something to cultivate and make a priority, and to take a more active presence with my writing once again.
I think we can up our game.
So I'm stepping up.

And in honor of a year's worth of writing here is a sample of some of my favorite TG posts over the past year. If you're new to the site, please take the time to check them out. They give a great sense of what we're about.

- Max Nova, our most stalwart writer, starts us off proper - saying good by to G.W.
- Happy Birthday
- An Open Letter To The Company That Rejected Me
- Hunting The World's Most Dangerous Game
- The Sad Strange Tale of the Girl with Red Hair - Part 1, Part 2, and Responses 1 & 2 & 3
- A Moment in Time
- Art & Death
- The Debut of SharkBear (or the Impossible Argument)
- Jason and David go the the Movies
- New Year's Resolutions
- The Top 5 Rich People Most Likely to Pull Off Being Batman
- No Holds Barred
- Turn Off the Lights
- Why I Don't Play Risk
- On Volunteering
- Where the Hell is Matt, the Dancing Man?
- Getting to Work
- 25 Facts by Michael Phelps
- TG The Movie - 1 & 2
- It's True
- Sesame Street Sure Grew Up
- Francis Warner
- We Hate 'Heroes'
- When You Need Help Just Call
- Urinal Etiquette
- The Story of Reginald P. Banker or It's Hard Out Here For a Pig
- And This is Not Our Fate
- A Guide to Tipping
- The Most Interesting Man in the World
- The Turkish Guide to Beard Grooming
- Obama vs. The Prince of Pop
- Auto-Tune the Nation
- The Subliminal Apology of Starbucks
- Traffic Atrocity
- Musical Artists of the Decade 1, 2, 3, 4 and Post-Script
- How it Makes You a Weapon
- Where I Live - South Jersey & Maryland
- The Case for Universal Health Care
- A Letter to the NFL

Here's to another year - And a new Gentleman, Brett Abelman, who will be joining us shortly.

Rock on.

- Jason

Friday, July 17, 2009

Be a Gentleman

Wondering how you too can become a member of the elite writing society that is These Gentlemen? Well, look no further, cause now is your chance.

We're looking for a new full time writer here at TG. Interested? Of course you are. So what do you have to do?

Shoot a sample post, along with a brief description of who you are and what you like to write about to jschlaf@gmail.com. A bit about why you're interested in TG wouldn't hurt either. But the sample is the main thing - give us an idea of your voice and interests.

Look forward to reading you.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

A Summary

If you're new to our little part of the interweb, you may not know quite what we're all about. That's why I've compiled a list of all our most-oft tagged items, to paint a story of These Gentlemen.

Music (29)

Memory (28)

Ozkirbas (27)

Politics (22)

Obama (14)

Bacon (12)

Comics (11)

Art (11)

Damo (11)

Video Games/ Video Games and Myth (11)

News (10)

These Gentlemen (10)

DC/Washington DC/Washington DC survival (10)

New Mexico (8)

Books (7)

Links (7)

Children (7)

Site Management (7)

Red Haired Girl (6)

Batman (5)

Sports (5)

Christmas (5)

TV (5)


In case you were skimming, we value bacon just under the 44th President of the United States, and Ozkirbas over both Mr. Obama and politics on the whole. We talk about ourselves and DC more than other states, books, and children. Batman and Christmas rank the same on our scale.



This representation is 100% accurate.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Thank You Dos Equis

I have the esteemed pleasure of welcoming a new writer to our midst of Gentlemen. His name is Matt Lindeboom, a Loyola College graduate where he was known as the most literary man on campus. There are some important facts you should know about Boom... half of which are true:
  • His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man's entire body.
  • His blood smells like colon.
  • He was the Editor in Chief of his college newspaper.
  • He's a lover, not a fighter... but he's also a fighter, so watch yourself around him.
  • He taught English to school kids in Thailand for a year after college.
  • His personality is so magnetic, he is unable to carry credit cards.
  • He is in a band called OTIS is the Elevator.
  • Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.
  • He has just started two other blogs, one is an educational video-blog about alcohol called The Educated Pour.
  • If he were to mail a letter without postage, it would still get there.
  • His reputation is expanding faster than the universe.
  • So is his ego.
  • He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels.
  • He is a member of Gryffindor (the championship-winning Loyola College dodgeball team of 2008).
  • He lives vicariously through himself.
  • He is a Gentleman.
  • There is a beer named after his family name of Lindeboom.
Matt Lindeboom is the most interesting man, in the world.


Matt's also a good friend with a great sense of humor who enjoys long walks on the beach and biting satire.

For reference PART I: I had some Lindeboom beer while in Amsterdam... pretty good.
For reference PART II: Dos Equis

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Be a Gentleman

It's with some sadness and disappointment that I announce that John Barkmeyer has had to bow out of Gentlemanly status due to issues of time and energy. It's a shame because I believe we would have all benefited from getting to read John's writing on a regular basis.

With that said, we now have an opening for a NEW Gentleman - and we're wondering who's interested. If you'd like to write for the site please send your name, a description of both yourself and why you're interested, and a brief writing sample in the style of These Gentlemen to jschlaf@gmail.com.

Looking forward to reading you.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Round Table Returns


Here at These Gentlemen, we strive to be, above all other things, gentlemanly. This is evidenced by our dedication towards being articulate, possessing rapier wit, shrewdly and urbanely commenting on the world around us, and, in this feature, civilized discourse.

On the go-ahead from he whom would be analogous to Sir Arthur Pendragon, our own Jason Schlafstein, I assume the role of Sir Constantine, the knight who became king following Arthur's death. Starting up again this week and continuing on for the foreseeable future, These Gentlemen will put aside some time each week to become Gentlemen of the Round Table. A question will be posed, and the Gentlemen shall provide their responses in a forum allowing for response and friendly debate.

This week, the Gentlemen tackle their pet peeves. This question was the subject of some discussion amongst the Table, as the original wording was "If you could eliminate one of your pet peeves, what would it be?" Hence, confusion broke out over whether this meant eliminate it as in wipe this thing of annoyance from the Earth, or eliminate as in get over the mentality that makes you hate this thing. Some Gentlemen answered the question one way, some both. Without further ado, let us delve into our responses.


David Pratt, the Aforementioned King Constantine




Were I to choose one pet peeve I have to eliminate, it would be seeing things out of place. Whenever I see things disorganized or misaligned I HAVE to fix them. I don't know how much time I've wasted in my life just because I've got this touch of OCD making me really irritated when things aren't where they belong.

That said, people should really organize things more carefully.


John Ozkirbas, Analogue of Percival



Peeve to Scour From the Face of the Earth: Rubbernecking

I hate rubbernecking. I hate it more than I hate it when pedestrians stand in the middle of the street, only to look at me dumbfounded when I pass them in my car. I understand the draw - the instinctual need to view the carnage resulting from a rousing game of bumper tag can sometimes be overpowering. And, yes, it's significantly safer to drive past an accident at a slower, more forgiving speed. People (and their kids) tend to do things like panic and run out into the middle of the road. Or debris may need to be avoided. But, that's not why people do it. No, people are far more interested in "OMG! Wat haPP3nD1!1!" and that is not the proper excuse to do 15 mph in a 60 mph zone. Because at that point you're getting in my way. You're aggravating other drivers on the road. You're making the general environment on the road hazardous for everyone. All because you couldn't ignore the fact you were curious. And you slowed down, so the person behind you is going to look. And the next person. And the next person. AD INFINITUM.

Peeve to Get Over: Answering the question I've just asked an authority figure like I was asking you.

It's the situation where you've put your neck out to participate, to clear up some confusion, and that guy behind you (you know him) just has to chime in. To let you know he knows. And the sick thing is? He thinks he's helping. Or at least trying to make it look that way. Maybe I feel like he thinks he's better than me and I don't like that. Or maybe he could really just be saying anything and could be totally wrong. I ask the authority figure because I trust the authority figure. And if the authority figure doesn't know, I can live with that. But, if the authority figure doesn't know and chime-in-guy's acting like he does, I don't know if he's actually correct. He thinks he is. And he certainly might sound like it. But, there's no reasonable guarantee. And, of course, I'm going to remember it. Leaving me more confused than before I asked. Yeah, it sounds a little immature. It's a little maddening. And, I definitely need to get over it. Maybe. Or other people should stop doing it. But, that's probably not going to happen.


Max Nova, Keeper of Merlin's Beard



One pet peeve of mine that i wish I didn't have:

I'm way to sensitive to sound. I wish I wasn't so easily irritated by external music or the stomp of roommates walking above my room. There are many times where I wish I just didn't notice sound so much.

One pet peeve I wish would actually go away:

I think probably my rant about driving. I wish people would actually use their turn signal and horn as God/Spaghetti Monster intended. It's so easy!


Brittany Graham, The Lady in the Lake




It's not so much a pet peeve as a compulsion, but I would eliminate my hatred for flipped shirt sleeves and uneven collars, because other people seem to get so much satisfaction from doing it on purpose to upset me, so it happens a lot.


Damien Nichols, The Green Knight




One of my worst pet peeves is when people don't treat IM conversations like face to face conversations. I wish it didn't annoy me so much, but I get so frustrated when I THINK I'm in a riveting conversation with somebody only to be ignored/neglected for like 20 minutes out of the blue. As if the concept that we are exchanging thoughts in real time should be any less significant in a digital medium rather than in person or over the phone. The "idle" status indicator is helpful, but it's kinda backhanded ya know? Like "by the way I'm gonna have to disappear for a few minutes in 10 minutes ago."

Maybe there should be more options for your availability status to help demystify what is going on on the other side of the digital tubes. To that end I recommend adding two new status options to the standard list of available, busy, and invisible: multitasking and clusterfucked. With the addition of multitasking I will know not to expect rapt attention to my every word and will be less likely to give it, which is totally fine. And clusterfucked lets me know to limit my attempts at conversation to legitimate concern and sincere condolences.

That being said, maybe I should just stop spending so much time on teh Gchatz and live my life. I officially have friends whose image in my head is their profile picture. That can't be good.


Sir DinaDan Strauss




I go nuts when I hear teeth scraping across wood. Like, even with popsicle sticks. Ugh. Awful. I could certainly do without that.


Ali Daniels, The Lady Guinevere



I will be the first person to tell you how unreasonable this pet peeve is, and that's why it's the one I'd like to get rid of. I hate being left out of things. It irritates me in the worst way, and then I end up down in the dumps for the rest of the day. Often I know it's not purposeful, just incidental that I wasn't thought of, but I can't help taking it personally sometimes. It's stupid things too. Recently, a friend tagged 18 of my friends in a note on facebook, and I immediately thought, "Well if it involves so many of my other friends, shouldn't it involve me too?" Stupid, and I'd like to be rid of it.

My eradicate pet peeve: People who are running more than 5 minutes late for a restaurant reservation who don't call the restaurant to tell them. You're throwing off our groove. Make the call, or get eradicated.


Stephen Bragale, Often mistaken for Sir Tristan



My biggest pet peeve is when ice cubes melt together and form a large chunk of ice. It's bad enough when it happens with a bag of ice and you have to break it all down, but what's even worse is when it happens in a glass. If they melt together in a cup then I have to deal with balancing the ice and making sure it doesn't slide into my face. If I could prevent this from happening, or the annoying feeling that follows when it happens, I'm confident that the recession would instantaneously end.


We thank ye, good yeomen and ladies fair, and hope you will join us next week as we Gentlemen of the Round Table continue our noble deeds.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Teaser for These Gentlemen 2: DST

Last Summer. A movie was made.

(A close up of a gravestone reading "Brett Ratner" can be seen. It explodes. Jason Heat and David Pratt are ragged, walking down an empty road assumedly nearby.)

Jason: Rest in pieces, Brett Ratner.

David: Do you think this will hurt my chances of becoming president?

Jason: Murder? Assault? Grave Mutilation? I'm sure you won't be the first president to do any of that.

A Group Was Forged

(Jason raises a bottle of apple cider amongst a group of friends)

Jason: May we henceforth be known as These Gentlemen. Art. Politics. Life.

Damien: Culture?

Jason: Not anymore, Damo. 

(A tear rolls down Jason's cheek.)

Jason: Not anymore.

Now... A Nation in Crisis

(Adam Winer bursts through a pair of double doors. Dan Strauss and some nameless people are typing furiously in front of some expensive computer hardware)

Adam: Come on, people. Talk to me. We're the media. Give me something.

Dan: Sources indicate that time is literally being stolen from the American people.

Adam: Validate the source?

(Dan types faster)

Dan: Hold on - one minute. I need one more minute. I'm in!

(Something flashes onto a big screen)

Adam: How far back does this go?

Dan: Since the 18th Century, sir

Adam: Mother of God.

(Adam twitters: "America is screwed")

An Ancient Evil

(A voice can be heard as we see bundles of small booklets being dropped on wooden doorsteps)

Ben Franklin (voice): Soon, my true plan will be complete. Houses all across America will have Farmers Almanacs, allowing me to steal an hour of time once every year from everyone! Their life energy will become mine. And I will be immortal!

A President Elect

(A press room full of reporters surrounding a podium. David Pratt talks in front of the microphone)

David: My fellow Americans, as your youngest and brightest president I have solved the budget crisis, fixed healthcare, eliminated hunger and disease, made our country 110% energy independent, and removed America from all forms of moral ambiguity. Alas, the current crisis I cannot deal with alone. I'm calling These Gentlemen.

Last Summer These Gentlemen Got Revenge. But on 9/1/2009...

Steve: We're going to do what?

Max Nova: The man wanted our national bird to be the turkey.

Dan: Stuff I Love - 128: Not having an hour ripped away from my life every year

Steve: But, I'm just a humble banker! And Max you're a-

Max Nova: Here's some advice-

(Max cocks a barretta)

Steve: ...Touché

These Gentlemen.
Take.
Time.
Back.

(An interrogation room in Black and White, filled with wafting cigarette smoke. Scotty Maxwell is tied to a chair. Bloody and surrounded by three men with their sleeves rolled up, one of whom is Sam Elliot.)

Scotty: I've been hit harder at metal concerts

Elliot: You've been silent long enough, Scotty. You're gonna talk. And you're gonna talk now.

(Scotty spits on Elliot. Elliot smacks him. John Ozkirbas bursts into the room.)

Ozkirbas: You can't do that to my client. You're out of your jurisdiction, Elliot.

Elliot: Boy, you don't know the meaning of jurisdiction.

Scotty: No, really guys. It's ok. I have the perfect recipe for washing the blood out of my shirt without the black fading.

Introducing Ali Daniels and Brittany Graham:

(Ali and Brittany are cocking and loading an endless array of hardware. Jason and David look uneasy.)

Brittany: If it makes you feel any better, the Oscars make me cry.

Ali: (cocks a shotgun) This one's for George.

David (whispering): I thought we were called These Gentlemen.

(Brittany reaches into a her pant pockets and pulls out a rocket launcher and hands it to Ali)

Brittany: I designed these myself.

Ali: I'm gonna give Ben Franklin the spanking his parents never did.

Jason (whispering): That's progress.

and John Barkmeyer

Ben Franklin: Dear God-

John (voice): Call me J.A.J.

Ben Franklin: Finally! A response! I've been waiting so long-

(John is silent.)

Ben Franklin: Damn you, J.A.J.!

THESE GENTLEMEN 2

(Damien levels a revolver at the camera)

Damien: Post this.

DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME

(A close up of a closed eye-lid. A heart-monitor beeps. Once. Twice. Three times. The eye flips open)

Female voice: Elan?

TG 2: DST

We are here to entertain you.